Sunday, July 15, 2007; 11:05 PM
back to nature
My favourite time of the day at the barn is during sunset on a clear day - when the clouds catch the rays and spread them out across the sky in a kaleidoscope of colours like rainbow jam spread on toast.

It was a cold, crisp, winter day at the barn and fog was streaming out of all the horses' nostrils, chomping impatiently on their bits as they pawed the ground with their hooves, striking clouds of dust into the winter mist. I sat on Midnight's fence as he ate his hay, my feet dangling as he turned to nuzzle my knee occasionally. Behind me the barn cat sharpened his claws on a tree, imagining himself a devillish hunter of the wild, springing lightly from branch to branch. It's a nice mellow feeling to sit there, basking in the sunset. It's nice to wander out across the fields, with an excited group of young girls trailing along, leading hungry little ponies back out to graze. It's nice to watch the flock of ibises glide home just before the final rays of the sun slip down below the horizon.

It's rare, short moments like these that make me stop, take a deep breath and relish in the beauty of it all. I spoke to Christine today about cutting off some of my shifts - because I am in a seriously tight financial position at the moment and am struggling to pay my way, and I will miss working Sundays at my barn - it's always relaxed and atmospheric in a way.
Nevertheless, I just lodged my tax return a few hours ago, so hopefully I will be receiving a cheque in the mail soon and won't be so hard pressed for cash.

My dog still isn't back, and everyday is another long wait by the phone for news to come through. God, you look after the sparrows, so please look after my dog too. I just want him to be safe and warm with food in his stomach.

It's been barely over a day and already I miss you. I refused to get out of bed this morning because my pillow smelt like your hair, and I pressed the snooze button ten times before forcing myself up, because all I wanted to do is lay there in your scent, as borderline psychotic as it may sound. It's going to be hours till I next see you again, and although we've been seeing each other almost every day, it never seems enough, and I'm marvelling at how I ever managed to go months without speaking in my previous relationship.

I'm probably not sleeping tonight working on assigments, and it will make tomorrow come even slower, even slower till when I next see you again.

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