God, there's nothing I want more than to be there for you tomorrow night, but I can't because my mum will be here, but I know if I'm not there, you're going to do something completely stupid like drowning yourself in alchohol, or hurting yourself in some way you always do, and there's nothing I can do if I'm not there. What can I do? I feel so helpless when it comes to you, and usually I know what to say or do, but I've said before so many times that I've never met anyone as messed up as you. But it's alright when I'm there because you smile at me and I know everything is alright.
It's crazy beautiful the way we snuggle on the couch just watching random stuff on tv and the way we randomly glance at each other every five seconds just to make sure we're not going anywhere, and the way I sit with my head against you as you eat with your hand on my knee. Who could not
fall for you? Warm but silent, strong but troubled. You affectionately call me your 'princess', and I call you my bodyguard, and if any of our friends heard, they would laugh, but we wouldn't care.
MJY says you're hard to talk to and very closed up, but I tell him that you're talkative and open and cheery, and he points out that you're only that way when you're with me. I open your walls, but tomorrow I won't be there when you need me the most, and if there is one wish I could wish is that I could be there, because if I don't I might regret it for the rest of my life. Please please please don't let anything bad happen to you. What can you do when you can do nothing? It's bad timing, bad timing in a realistic world, but we defied all logic when you looked into my eyes and told me seriously that you would always protect me.
You promise that someday you will buy me flowers and take me away to places I've always wanted to go, and I believe you